Thursday, August 17, 2006

When It Rains It Pours...


...At least in regards to Asian women talking’ a lot of trash.

I called in the office breakfast order this morning since I had to put everything on my credit card. My order was the “Healthy” wrap with coffee. Others ordered eggs and double hash browns and one girl ordered an ice tea with a plain donut.

As I was dictating the donut order to the Asian lady on the other end of the phone, she interrupted in order to shamelessly berate me: “We don’t have donut! And donut not healthy!”

“No, they’re not,” I agreed. “But moving right along, a number 3 Healthy wrap, iced coffee…”

“Ah, much better,” she said as if she was responsible for correcting my previous bad decision.

I emailed the girl with the donut order and told her the story. I heard her spew out laughter all the way from my office.

But, now I must know: How does one redeem herself in the eyes of the trash-talkin’ Asian woman? Is it as simple as ordering the Healthy wrap?

I tend to doubt it. For, if this were the case, Asian women the world over and I wouldn’t have the problems that we do. And boy do we ever have problems…

6 comments:

Matt Brand said...

She's wrong. Donuts are healthy, if you get the new Tofu Donut from Dunkin. Also the Spurlena Donut is good for a healthy bowel movement. Speaking of which, excuse me for a moment...

copyranter said...

you keep it up, and North Korea and China are going to simultaneously nuke the bejesus out of us.

Gigi said...

Ha! Green poop? Interesting, Slinkers. As for you, my dear Copyranter:

A) This is so a joke (because, you know, I met an Asian girl before that was nice and have a friend that looks Asian).

B) North Korea's already gonna nuke our asses.

C) It's always fun to piss off an entire culture, wouldn't ya say?

But really, I love every Asian woman who hasn't talked trash. My poor pa lived in Hong Kong for a long time, so I basically grew up in an Asian household. Maybe that's why I talk a lot of trash. Hmmm?

Anonymous said...

how does having a pa who grew up in hong kong equivalent to having grown up in an asian household? and for your information, asian culture is not an entire culture - it's made up of various cultures. trash talk is not culture-specific but then again neither is ignorance.

Gigi said...

Dear "Anonymous":

This is clearly a joke, which you don't understand. It's okay; I'll write a disclaimer next time for those without a sense of humor.

Maulleigh said...

I had to leave a restaurant once because the Asian waitress was SO UNBELIEVEABLE RUDE. And I'm not like that. But I choose to believe that every Asian woman is like that.