Thursday, February 09, 2006

Pattern Identified

Ha! I kill myself. And if you've read my recent posts, you might actually believe that this is a literal statement. Every month I have a nervous break down at about the same time. And every month it is for the same reason: I'm PMS'n. To a guy, this is no kind of excuse. To us chicks though, it is the difference between night and day - to use a cheap cliche, that is.

The funny thing is, I've been doing this freak out for no reason and then instantaneous revelation ("Oh shit, it was PMS...I should have known") for 13 years now and still the pattern never seems to occur to me until after the fact.

I ask myself why I'm so depressed, why I'm freaking out, why I'm so miserable. And the answer is always the same, yet I never seem to quite get it.

It would be ideal if I could pinpoint it beforehand, so I could hold my tongue the entire week. The following week is obligatory clean up week, wherein I call everyone I freaked out on to apologize. They too should start recognizing the pattern. Then maybe they would start calling me in order to collect their apologies. Or even better yet -- maybe they'll just stop picking up the phone when they see my name every second week of the month.