Saturday, February 18, 2006

My roommate is huffing around the house this very moment.

I think he's mad at me, and I'm pretty sure it's because I left all my recycling by the trashcan for 3 days; because I conveniently ignored a small pile of coffee grains I spilled on the stove, or because I tend to lay on the couch like a jungle sloth after work, have Cesar over for coffee every morning before I go to work, and because I set up shop in the living room, making it more of an office than a TV den.

But, beyond this, I really don't see the need for the attitude problem.

Really. Well... in his defense, I admit that I'm downright useless during the work week. I leave the house for 10-11 hours per day, I come home, and, quite frankly, don't really feel like lugging the recycling down 4 flights of stairs; don't want to break out the paper towels to clean up the grains; don't care to get off the couch in lieu of doing something productive; enjoy having an alternative to my stuck-in-the-potty-training-stage-of-development roommate over for coffee & conversation before work; and would love to use my NYC-licious, $1,125/month room as an office, but it is so damn small that my bed doubles as a floor. Honest. Plus, there are no windows, so I can't breathe. Did I mention that I'm clastrophobic? And, that I have asthma? This is not a good combination, especially when my clastrophobia turns into hyperventilation. My asthma follows in suit, and, well, it's just a downhill, medically-unprescribed game of hell's dominoes from there. In essence, I kind of sort of have to bring my computer and papers and office supplies and phones and purse and slippers into the living room. Every night. Or. I. Will. Die.

So, go to hell, Mr. Poopie Pants.

Oh, on top of this. I don't have a problem with anything he does (except this moping problem, which clearly annoys the living bejeezus out of me). Not because he doesn't do anything annoying, but because we are paying way too much rent to not be "allowed" to do anything that we want. For $1,125/month, I will craft a couch made of Costa Rican espresso if I, for some reason, feel the need...

Um, yeah. A couch of espresso.