Update: I’m still a dinosaur; I now have jock itch.

I have been reduced to rubbing Selsun Blue on my back to get rid of my dinosaur spots. After I went through the $50 tube of cream that my dermatologist prescribed to me, I googled its name (“Oxy-something”) to see if I had the right prescription. I figured maybe the pharmacist couldn’t read doc’s handwriting and thus gave me the wrong cream.

I was right:

“Use for bla, bla, jock itch and bla…” Ughhh.

I called the dermatologist to say that my spots weren’t gone and I ran out of the jock itch cream he prescribed. His secretary suggested I come back in to get it looked at.

“Is that going to cost me another $20?” I asked.
“Yes, it costs $20 every time you come in.”

No wonder he messes up the prescription. Business must be slow.

Rumor has it, though, that dandruff shampoo does the trick. So, I’ve been making the Skeeze put on my shower loofa gloves and scrub my back. This morning I woke up with a raw, red back. I am proud to say, however, that the spots are going away.

Jock itch cream and dermatologist, $70
Selsun Blue, $10
Priceless jokes, generic