Wednesday, December 26, 2007

What Not To Say Too Loud While in a Bar in the Midwest Two Days Prior to Christmas

"I hate Jesus."

Doesn't go over so well... Even my friend, the ex-crack/meth addict, was offended. Guess he's kind of a big deal here.

When not ostracizing myself, I've been chiiilllliinnnn'. Made the below wall hanging with my sis. Still have to throw some resin on it, which is what makes it super duper fine.



It's blurry, but you get the idea.

Actually, I'm lying; I've been doing quite a bit of work, but nothing I can mention. I'm not doing anything that will be super entertaining when I can tell ya about it, but I still can't say anything about it...which makes it seem a lot more interesting than it really is. Following me? It's the V.I.P. room effect. Seems cool because it's mysterious.

I'
m going to Miami with Dave on Friday and we're taking motorcycle riding classes. That's right, on Monday, I will be a licensed motorcyclist. Scary. Admittedly, I probably won't ride a lot/ever. I'll just pull my license out here and there to impress the fellas. (Although I tend to believe that men don't think girls who ride motorcycles are especially sexy).

For New Years Eve, we're heading to the Raleigh Hotel in Miami. My friend promotes there. Otherwise, we'd probably go out the night before and just do dinner/drinks on NYE. We're supposed to go out with my friend and her husband, but my friend just gave birth and is trying to figure out how to milk herself so that the baby doesn't get drunk (from drinking alcohol-infested breast milk). She says she doesn't think she can store enough milk to last until the next day, so she wants us to meet somewhere between Miami and West Palm. Ummm, no. I'm just not that good of a friend/person.

This post is boring. My cousin is hot. Feast your eyes:


He's not blood related, but you know... Kinda weird.

4 comments:

T. said...

First, the VIP effect doesn't work as well if you ANNOUNCE it beforehand you nut.

Second, I'm 200% straight, but even I must admit your cousin is hot.

Gigi said...

Good thing I didn't announce it then!

As for the cousin, even if he were blood-related I wouldn't be able to tone down the attraction. Now I see what Kentucky has been raving about all these years...

Anonymous said...

And your cousin is 18 feet tall.

When he laughs, does furniture move around?

And his arm is the width of my head. (I can't see the other one, but I presume it's the same).

I too am straight and yes think he's hot - in my British, "awfully fine chap" sort of way.

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

ok. can I date your cousin and can we be friends, cause seriously, I would have laughed hysterically had you said that...and actually i'm quit spiritual but, hey, sometimes Jesus....needs to buck up and ya know, show me hes there. lol.